"Luck Be a Lady"

I pointed out to Ron yesterday that I'd managed to write 3 blog posts in 3 days. He responded with, "And the stock market has been up 3 days in a row. You'd better keep up the posting."

Which isn't why I'm here right now writing this. Or rather, my suspicion that my blog posts have anything to do with the upturn in the market is not the reason why I'm writing this. That suspicion is non-existent, as a matter of fact. So everyone can relax. The economic future of our country does not rest on me, who doesn't know the difference between a hedge fund and a hedgehog, except that the latter can fit in the palm of your hand and looks like this:



While the former has at least one (former) manager that screwed Palm Beach and looks like this.



But I digress.

My point is that nothing regarding luck or superstition has ever or should ever rest on me. I am not a lucky person, though not an unlucky person either--just non-lucky. Therefore, I'm not superstitious either. (Except that I have, on occasion, been known to be a bit obsessed with vampires NOT of the Bernie Madoff ilk.) Wait, let me correct myself (though let the parenthetical statement remain as true): I am superstitious about one thing. I don't like to say something is going well, because I'm sure it will begin to go bad quickly if I do, be it my health, my work, my writing, or my relationships. I have to stop myself from literally knocking on wood when forced to admit out loud anything is going well. I blame this fact on my mother who has always refrained from sharing potentially good news, afraid whatever it is won't come to pass if she jinxes it. As a result, we never know what's going on with her until after it's already gone on, be it good or bad.

Ironically, a couple of my siblings dubbed me "The Golden Child" a long time ago (no earlier than 1986 since that's when the movie came out). I've never pressed them for an explanation since when they call me that, it's not with an abundance of fondness. I would say, "They never read my blog so I don't risk their objections (wrath) in saying as much." But then I'd be afraid of (thank you, Mom) jinxing myself. (*knock on wood, all is well*)

I never enter raffles. I could buy 150 tickets out of 200, and my name would not be drawn. I don't buy lottery tickets. Not one of my numbers would ever match. I don't wish on falling stars or birthday candles. I don't carry a rabbit's foot. I don't have a lucky number. And I don't eat fortune cookies . . . though I do eat Lucky Charms.

So don't rely on me for your luck. Go out and make it yourself.

Though you might be interested to know the stock market has gone up since I started writing this.

(crap. knock on wood, all is well.)